11.5: The Dark Side of Social Media
The Risks of Social Media and Social Networking
Do you belong to a social network? Do you recall the first social media site you joined? Or do you choose to not participate in social media? If anything is clear, since the introduction of the first social media sites in the late 1990s, social networking sites like Facebook, Instagram, and Snapchat have integrated themselves into all forms of life, in particular, interpersonal relationships. Interestingly, approximately 70% of adults report using social media sites daily, yet most of the same people report holding negative beliefs about the effects of social media (McKinnon & Dougherty, 2019). In this section, we first by exploring some of social media's benefits, then examine social media from the dark side of communication by revealing how social media is linked to mental health concerns, cyberbullying, stalking and sexting, hyperpersonal communication, and the spread of disinformation.
Some of the earliest social networking sites, like Classmates, were well received because they allowed people to connect with long-lost friends and family members. Since that time, several benefits of social media sites have been identified, including increased social connectivity, social involvement, entertainment, and information attainment (Khan, et al., 2014). Through increased social connectivity we can reach out to family and friends (Instagram, Facebook). We can also use social media for networking purposes (LinkedIn), and even to connect through online dating (Match.com, Bumble, and Tinder). Due to targeted platforms, we are witnessing increased social involvement, in particular people using social media to connect over common interests, whether it be to commiserate over gaming (Twitch), find the best local restaurants (Yelp), or join an online hiking club. One of the most influential aspects of social media sites is that they have increased our access to information. The Pew Research Center has found that over 40% of 18–29 year olds get their news from social media sites (Shearer, 2021). Not only that, but largely due to our access to digital media, students were able to continue with their education despite restrictions from the COVID-19 pandemic. Finally, social media sites provide a great source of entertainment. During the COVID-19 pandemic, at least one author of this chapter found herself addicted to YouTube, subscribing to a variety of different channels, including Yoga by Adrienne and Hoopla Doodle (a site that teaches you how to draw cartoon animals). Through subscribing to these sites for entertainment, we join communities of like-minded individuals.
Although social media has fulfilled many of its earliest promises for increased opportunities for connection, these opportunities have been met with many risks, such as psychological isolation, exposure to harmful materials, social risk, and loss of time (Linvill, 2019). As parents, both authors of this chapter have often grappled with setting appropriate boundaries while trying to teach our children responsible social media use. However, as anyone with a cell phone and social media account can tell you, the temptation to look at social media accounts can be a bit overwhelming, and the access is not without risks.
Time Risk
Social media provides a variety of entertaining and possibly addictive activities that can suck up the time of users. For example, research by Common Sense Media (2019) shows that the average person checks their cell phone more than 100 times a day (whether they receive a notification or not) and that approximately two-thirds of teens report accessing on-screen media up to 4 hours a day. Recent research indicates that the average person spends 145 minutes a day monitoring and posting in their social media accounts (Statista, 2021). This represents a major shift in how we use our time in a day.
Mental Health Concerns
In the fall of 2021, a former Facebook employee turned whistleblower revealed company documents showing that the social media giant was aware that Instagram can harm the mental health of children and teens (Romo, 2021). Although the revelation shocked many, research has identified a link between our mental health and the use of social media. First, researchers have found that over the past decade and a half, face-to-face interactions have declined as social media and electronic communication have increased (Twenge & Uhls, 2017). During the same period, researchers have found that self-reported rates of depression, anxiety, isolation, and suicidal thoughts have increased, leading many scholars to suggest that there may be a relationship to social media use (Twenge, et al., 2019; Vannucci, et al., 2017; Primack, et al., 2017; De Choudhury, et al., 2013). However, research is mixed, showing that modest amounts of digital communication and social media use can be linked to well-being and happiness (Davis, 2012). The mixed results of the research may indicate it is not social media per se, but how people use social media that impacts mental health. The increase in cyberbullying is just one way that social media may negatively impact mental health.
Cyberbullying
The world of social media has provided new opportunities for bullying, or cyberbullying. Cyberbullying is a form of bullying that takes place through cell phones, tablets, and computers. It can occur through social media such as Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat, Twitter, and TikTok, but it also occurs through text messages, online gaming communities, and message boards such as Reddit. This form of bullying “includes sending, posting, or sharing negative, harmful, false, or mean content about someone else” (StopBullying.gov, 2021). A 2021 Pew Research survey found that 4 in 10 adults in the United States who use social media report being victimized by at least one type of bullying behavior online (Vogels, 2021). Online harassment is more common for younger adults (48% of adults aged 29 and younger), significantly more common for LGBTQIA+ adults than their straight peers (51% report being targeted), and as compared to other groups, Black and Hispanic adults are more likely report being harassed for their race. In addition, 20% of adults report being harassed because of their religion. Typical forms of online bullying include offensive name-calling, spreading false rumors, receiving explicit messages, physical threats, stalking behaviors (such as constant monitoring of location and company by someone other than a guardian), and personal explicit sharing without permission (i.e., revenge porn). One area that has witnessed disturbing growth is the proliferation of racial hostility.
Social media has created a space where messages of hate and prejudice have flourished. It is likely, if you are regularly on social media, that you have encountered racist and or sexist messages. Often racism, sexism, and other forms of prejudice are presented using covert tactics to mask the underlying hostility in the message, such as using memes, emojis, and GIFs as weapons (Matamoros-Fernandez, 2018; Jackson, 2017; Lamerichs, et al. 2018). For example, in November 2021, US Congressman Paul Gosar of Arizona posted an edited anime video of himself killing Representative Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez and attacking President Joe Biden, leading to a rare censure in Congress and removing him from his committee posts. After receiving widespread criticism for the posting, he tried to defend himself by saying “Relax, it is a cartoon.” Most people who post messages of hate are not famous, like Gosar, giving them a false sense of protection. Adding to the challenge, people often create fake identities to post racist messages, leaving victims with little recourse (Farkas et al., 2018).
Sexting and Cyberstalking
The popular Netflix series You tells the tale of a charming serial killer who uses social media to feed his toxic obsessions and stalk his victims. Just as the show illustrates, social media platforms have provided new avenues for outlier communication behaviors, such as sexting and cyberstalking (Linvill, 2019). Sexting is the practice of sending and/or exchanging sexually themed images, videos, or messages on cell phones and through social media applications such as Snapchat. In some cases, the exchanges are mutual and welcome, but in many cases, sexting takes on a form of sexual harassment, such as when an abuser sends unwanted images to someone, or when someone has access to images that they then threaten to make public. One study of high school students found that 28% of high school sophomores and juniors had shared naked pictures of themselves through text or email, and 31% had requested naked pictures (Rosin, 2014). Social media sites have also contributed to a growth in cyberstalking, since these websites enable surveillance and voyeurism of often unwitting victims who provide a treasure-trove of personal information online. In the cases of both sexting and cyberstalking, laws have been slow to keep up with changes in technology, providing little protection for victims.
Relationships, Self-Disclosure, and Social Media
As discussed in Chapter 10, self-disclosure is an important aspect of developing and maintaining our interpersonal relationships. Social media use can influence the trajectory of self-disclosure that occurs in a relationship, which can veer into the dark side. Have you ever found yourself writing a text, sending a Snap, or communicating on a Discord channel something that you have regretted because it was TMI (too much information) and you didn’t want to put it out there? It’s likely that at that moment (because you were behind a keyboard), it seemed easier and not that risky to reveal all that information. In contrast to the type of self-disclosure risks we might engage in while face to face, in a mediated context, via social media, we may engage in more hyperpersonal communication (Walther, 1997). With hyperpersonal communication , in online interactions, self-disclosure can go from surface-level to intimate and in-depth very quickly without the benefit of mutual reciprocity or establishing of trust. Lack of nonverbal cues as well as the desire to promote self-presentation and receive online validation results in hyperpersonal communication (Walther, 2007). For some, this can be very emotionally satisfying; but for others, it can result in misperceptions and misunderstandings leading to increased relational conflict and a decrease in trust and intimacy between relational partners.
Also impacting relationships and levels of self-disclosure in a relationship is the concept of disinhibition, which occurs via social media in online interactions. Disinhibition refers to the freedom (without discretion) or lack of restraint one might show when communicating online (Joinson, 2007). Joinson found that self-disclosure levels were much higher when communicating online versus in face-to-face interactions, and that there was an increase in the more intimate levels of self-disclosure in these online contexts. Have you heard about “keyboard warriors”? These are persons online who make abusive or aggressive posts on social media platforms often while concealing their real identities. Frequently, these keyboard warriors will post comments they would never say in a face-to-face situation. The anonymity of online interactions and lack of accountability creates enough disinhibition that toxic communicative behavior becomes normalized.
Before the 2010 documentary Catfish , we only understood “catfish” to mean a hearty freshwater fish with long feelers that look like cat whiskers. Since Nev Schulman’s documentary aired, we’ve discovered a whole new meaning of catfish that has nothing to do with fish. Shulman has turned his documentary into a popular reality TV series on MTV. According to Urbandictionary.com, a catfish ( Urban Dictionary: Catfish , 2017) is someone who makes a fake account on social media to lure people into a deceptive relationship. This modern definition has taken on quite a sinister connotation.
Since Catfish: The TV Show premiered on MTV in 2012, almost 200 episodes have been produced and aired. In each episode, the hosts try to unveil the identities of people involved in these mysterious online relationships. According to Social Catfish (a website that helps to identify and verify people), there are five basic reasons that people catfish others (Santiago, 2018).
- Revenge : Someone you know fakes an identity to lure you into a relationship only to reveal their identity, once they’ve gained your trust, for the purpose of hurting you.
- Catch a cheater : If someone suspects their significant other of cheating, they might set up a fake identity to try and prove unfaithfulness.
- Money : Scammers set up fake profiles with sob stories to try and defraud vulnerable people of money.
- Boredom : Some people are bored and catfish to entertain themselves.
- Insecure about themselves : Lots of catfishers lack the confidence to meet people and develop relationships in person, so they idealize themselves and hide behind a computer to pursue romanticized relationships.
So, how common is “catfishing?” Here are some interesting yet disturbing statistics:
- According to the FBI’s Internet Crime Report (Internet Crime Complaint Center, 2020), IC3 logged 23,751 cases of confidence fraud/romance scams in 2020. This resulted in the second largest financial loss due to internet crimes in 2020 at a cost of $600,249,821 to the victims. These numbers do not reflect the numerous catfishing scams that are unreported because victims are too ashamed to report the crime.
- By Facebook’s own reporting on its Transparency Center (Facebook - Meld je aan of registreer je, 2021), they took down 1.8 billion fake accounts in the 3rd quarter of 2021 alone (July–September). Clearly, setting up a fake account to prey on others is quite simple to accomplish on social media and dating sites.
- Women and people over the age of 60 are more likely to be victims of confidence fraud/romance scams (Better Business Bureau, 2020).
- Ryan Anderson (2016) cited a study completed by OpinionMatters, a global research agency. The study found 53% of online daters in the United States and the United Kingdom admitted to lying on their dating profiles. Over 20% of women misrepresented themselves by posting younger photos. This study revealed that men tended to lie about their financial situation, and women were more likely to lie about their age or appearance.
If you’ve ever watched Catfish: The TV Show you would take note of patterns of glaring red flags that signal someone is being catfished:
- The relationship moves very quickly. They refer to their victim as “boyfriend” or “girlfriend” and talk about “love” and their future together. This is all an effort to build and gain trust quickly to manipulate victims for what they want.
- Catfishers avoid showing their faces. There’s always a convenient excuse why they cannot FaceTime or video chat (camera is broken, bad internet connection, not a good time…)
- Their story is too good to be true. Two of the most common professions catfishers use on the TV show indicate they are models or rappers. They have internet stalked people and “borrowed” their photos to help enhance their lies. One episode of Catfish even had the victim convinced he was in a relationship with Katy Perry (Season 5, Episode 15, 2016).
- They ask for money. You barely know this person, they won’t meet you in person, they are a good-looking model or a successful rapper, but they need money.
These four signs stood out as the most obvious from a survey of the TV show. If you do an internet search on “Signs you’re being catfished,” lots of websites have written about this. Bottom line, trust your gut instincts. If something doesn’t seem right, ask questions, and do some research. There are several resources out there to help, including Catfish: The TV Show.
Responding to the Dark Side of Social Media
As we can see, like other forms of communication, social media has both a light and a dark side. Because the dark side of social media is so prevalent in our lives, it is important to set healthy boundaries for yourself and to develop a response plan that is based on competent communication.
- Set time limits for yourself in terms of how much of your day you are willing to spend on social media.
- Set limits on who you add to your social media accounts. You do not need to add everyone.
- Be thoughtful and respectful in your communication exchanges, committing to positive exchanges.
- Check your outgoing messages and ask yourself, “Would I want my employer, mother, future self, or future child, to see this message?” If not, do not post or share.
- Commit to refraining from posting, sharing, or liking racist, sexist, agist, or other discriminatory messages.
- If necessary, use your voice to be an advocate to stop the spread of hurtful messages.
- If you experience bullying or other problems, reach out to someone you trust for help.
- Block offensive content and the people who send offensive messages. Consider reporting abuse to the platform, such as Twitter, Snapchat, and Instagram.