13.11: Natural Physiological Changes with Aging
Our bodies and our sexuality changes as we age. For more on this, see Chapter 11 on Sexuality Through the Lifespan. Here is a general list of some of the natural changes that occur with age related to sexual health.
- Decrease in hormones such as testosterone and estrogen
- Decrease in morning erections
- Decreased libido
- Decreased penile sensitivity
- Direct penile stimulation often required for erection
- Delayed ejaculation/orgasm, anorgasmia
- Less firm erection, some older men full rigidity seconds before ejaculation
- Ejaculatory urgency may be reduced
- Post orgasm/ejaculation, detumescence and testicular descent more rapid
- Less semen, less viable sperm
- Bladder control issues
- Longer refractory period
- Vaginal atrophy
- Thinning of vaginal tissue
- Lack of lubrication leading to vaginal dryness
- Pain with vaginal intercourse
- More time/stimulation needed to reach orgasm
Many of these physiological changes can present challenges, but there is also good news about aging and our sexual health. For some, the wisdom that comes with age, the knowing of one’s body, of a partner’s body, and less self-consciousness, can leave more room for pure sexual joy and freedom. In some cases, these physiological changes can present an opportunity for creativity that can lead to some of the best sex people have ever experienced. If erections are not always dependable for example or vaginas not always open to enveloping sex (aka penetrative) but people still want intimate connection, they become open to the many ways they can experience sensual and erotic pleasure in their bodies, ways that are less focused on one kind of sex, but open to many new ways of giving and receiving sexual pleasure.
It is empowering to be seen by a camera eye that is appreciative of older women’s beauty and experienced expression of sexuality. It is important, though, to understand that my feeling sensual/sexual does not depend on the male gaze. I must love and appreciate myself.
When I look in the mirror, or stretch and exercise, it is my challenge to get past notions of what constitutes a perfect body. The body that is sensitive, alert, alive, open, curious, willing, generous and relaxed is the body that has the most fun, whether hiking or playing pickleball or making love.
The woman who feels ageless is ageless. Jennie Orvino, born 1946