Rape is violence, motivated by men with power, anger,
selfishness, and sadistic issues. Rape is dangerous and destructive
and more likely to happen in the United States than in most other
countries of the world. There are 195 countries in the world today.
The US typically is among the worst in terms of rape (yes, that
means that most of the world’s countries are safer for women than
the US). Consecutive studies performed by the United Nations
Surveys on crime Trends and the Operations of Criminal Justice
Systems confirm that South Africa is the most dangerous,
crime-ridden nation on the planet in all crimes including rape (see
http://www.unodc.org/unodc/en/data-a...e-Systems.html).
The FBI typically keeps statistics on violent crimes committed
and reported to local police (unreported crimes cannot be counted
in the FBI Uniform Crime Reports). It summarizes all the local and
state crimes into reports made available on various government
Websites. From these data, the Bureau of Justice Statistics
provides specific rape rates per 100,000 for the years 1960 to 2006
(See Figure 1 below). Alaska is by far the most dangerous state as
far as rape rates are concerned and West Virginia is an example of
one of the safest.
Figure 1: Reported Rapes per 100,000 Population in United
States, Alaska (Worst State Rate), and West Virginia (Safest State
Rate), Years 1960-2006*
*Retrieved on 13 June, 2008 From
bjsdata.ojp.usdoj.gov/dataonl...byState.cfmThe United states in
general (being in the worst 5 percent of all the world’s countries)
has seen a slight decline in rape rates since the early 1990s, but
the danger and risks to the average woman is unacceptably too high.
It is estimated that 1 in 6 US women will be sexually assaulted in
their lifetimes and college-aged women are 4 times more likely to
be sexually assaulted than other US women (see http://www.rainn.org/statistics
). The Rape Abuse & Incest National Network, an online Web page
and the largest US’s anti-sexual assault organization provides
tremendous insight into rape. They also provide support for those
impacted by rape (1-800-656-HOPE and an online hotline at http://www.rainn.org ). Their definition
of rape and sexual assault is so concise that the US Office on
Violence against Women quotes them:
Sexual assault can be defined as any type of sexual contact or
behavior that occurs without the explicit consent of the recipient
of the unwanted sexual activity. Falling under the definition of
sexual assault is sexual activity such as forced sexual
intercourse, sodomy, child molestation, incest, fondling, and
attempted rape. Some more specific examples of sexual assault
include:
Unwanted vaginal, anal, or oral penetration with any
object
Forcing an individual to perform or receive oral sex
Forcing an individual to masturbate, or to masturbate someone
else
Forcing an individual to look at sexually explicit material or
pose for sexually explicit pictures
Touching, fondling, kissing, and any other unwanted sexual
contact with an individual's body
Exposure and/or flashing of sexual body parts
In general, state law assumes that a person does not consent to
sexual activity if he or she is forced, threatened, unconscious,
drugged, a minor, developmentally disabled, chronically mentally
ill, or believe they are undergoing a medical procedure.
Perpetrators of sexual assault can be strangers, friends,
acquaintances, or family members. Often, perpetrators commit sexual
assault by way of violence, threats, coercion, manipulation,
pressure, or tricks. In extreme cases, sexual assault may involve
the use of force which may include, but is not limited to:
Physical violence
Use or display of a weapon
Immobilization of victim
More often, however, sexual assault involves psychological
coercion and taking advantage of an individual who is incapacitated
or under duress and, therefore, is incapable of making a decision
on his or her own (Rape, Abuse, and Incest National Network (RAINN)
Retrieved 13 June, 2008 from http://www.ovw.usdoj.gov/sexassault.htm).
The Personal and Larger Social Levels of Rape’s Impact on
Society
In this discussion we will use C. Wright Mills’ Sociological
Imagination and study rape from both the personal and larger
sociological levels. Because of the way I context it here, this
section may sound much like an advice column with specific
suggestions and strategies for you to consider. Trust me, many
research-based principles guide this discussion and you can place a
high degree of confidence in these arguments.
The Personal Level: Whose Fault Is It?
The fault lies squarely on the rapist and his personal choices.
Rape, by the definition given above is, not consensual. Many
throughout the history of the world have defined rape as a form of
sex. Look at this statement carefully:
Rape ≠ Sex
Rape has no consent. Sex has mutual consent. Typically, force or
threats are used to coerce compliance. I often have students ask
me, “what if she agrees at night, then changes her mind in the
morning and says she was raped?” My response is that in this case
mutual consent occurred and a lie was told afterward. I then ask
the student why he or she asked this hypothetical question (I
assume they have a hard time believing the victim’s claim). Often
they’ve heard that “almost” all rape allegations are false. The
truth is that about 1 in 10 rape allegations prove to be unfounded
(see FBI report, 1996 at
www.fbi.gov/ucr/Cius_97/96CRIME/96crime2.pdf ).
The significant question here is why aren’t rapes reported more
often? The Bureau of Justice Statistics does a survey of crime
victimization in the US. In it, respondents are asked to report if
they had been the victims of various crimes. If they were, then
they are asked more detailed questions about the crime. With rape,
they often find that most rape victims do not report them to the
police. These results are reported for 2003 in Table 1 below:
Table 1: Percentage of Violent Crimes that Were Reported to the
Police by Victims
So, what might you say if you hear from someone that they were
raped? At the personal level, with your friends and family members
who might or ever have been raped, there is one crucial question
you must ask, “How are you doing now?” Whatever it takes, avoid the
common mistake of asking, “What were you doing when this happened?”
For many of us, we feel that our own safety is threatened when we
ourselves know the victim and we often ask “what happened?” in an
attempt to protect ourselves in the future. The point is to ask how
a rape survivor is doing now, because it keeps them in the now.
Their answer to how they are doing might provide insight into how
you might be of support of them. The question of what happened puts
them emotionally back in the time and place of the attack and
reopens the wound again.
The Oil and Water Paradigm
I’ve taught a paradigm for years to my students which has helped
them to distinguish the two core issues in the case of rape: first,
we live in a dangerous world which requires women to be vigilant in
defending and protecting themselves; and second, it is never the
victim’s fault. I call this the “Oil and Water Paradigm.” In
Figures: 2, 3, and 4 below, you see two exclusive and unmixable
sides of the same issue. Here’s the metaphor in a nutshell; no
matter how hard you try, the fundamental structure of oil and water
make them impossible to ever mix. Think of your bottle of Italian
salad dressing. You shake it vigorously and have to quickly pour it
on your salad before it separates again. Oil repels water. In this
paradigm, I use oil and water as metaphors for understanding these
ideas that should not be mixed (because they really don’t mix).
In Figure 2, you see the self-defense component of the dangerous
society we live in today. Women have to protect themselves from
attacks. True, most men would never attack a woman. But, women
can’t discern which men are safe and which are not, simply because
rapists are very predatory and deceptive. Don’t get me wrong women
are quite capable of living under these dangerous circumstances,
but morally shouldn’t have to. I heard a friend of mine say, “It’s
just sad that one-half of the population (women) has to live in
fear of the other half (men), because some of the other half might
attack them.” In the US, about 3 out of 4 rape victims knew their
assailant before the attack.
Women spend time, money, resources, and emotional energy being
vigilant against a potential attack. The burden of protection falls
mostly on them and their close friends and family. My students
carry their keys so they can use them as weapons, carry pepper
mace, take Karate, travel only with friends at night, and some even
have a safety plan for their apartment. But, you have to know,
there is no single preventative measure that can universally
prevent rape. I interviewed a former FBI profiler, Greg Cooper.
When I interviewed him he indicated that the FBI puts all the blame
for the rape on the perpetrator, not the victim.
“Often times rape victims blame themselves, trying to figure out
what exactly they did to cause the attack. From a law enforcement
point of view, victims have no responsibility. There is nothing
that the FBI can tell a woman to wear, to do, or to say that will
decrease her likelihood of being attacked. The perpetrator bears
all the blame and it’s him that we focus on. (From documentary
called “Oil and Water: The Truth About Rape” by Hammond available
at Insight Media at http://www.insight-media.com/IMHome.asp
).
Women know from their childhood that certain men can be dangerous
and that they have to become diligent in protecting themselves. In
Figure 3 you see the clear and simple truth that rape is never a
victim’s fault (remember that sex has consent rape does not). There
is not one case, ever, where a rape victim is at fault. I’ve heard
many argue with me on that point. They say, “what if she dressed in
sexy clothes, went into the bar looking for some action, invited
him up to her place, agreed to go on the date…” This type of
thinking seeks to shake the oil and water together by erasing that
line that separates them (oil and water don’t mix, no matter how
hard you shake the Italian dressing, it eventually separates back
into oil and water). If we ask them to explain the details, then
carelessly say something like, “why’d you go on a date with him
anyway?” then we’ve just blamed the victim.
Figure 4 shows both the ideas in the same diagram. It’s like the
woman standing on the sidewalk and a man drives up on the sidewalk
and runs her over. And an eye witness rushes to her aid and says,
“Why were you standing on that sidewalk when you knew a truck could
run you over? Were you trying to get attacked…”
Not only do rapists hurt their victims, they often blame them
verbally before they leave. This makes recovery even more difficult
since most rape victims already blame themselves (see Ullman et al
2007 about the construct of self-blame and a model for assisting
survivors in their recovery at
http://web.ebscohost.com/ehost/pdf?v...%40sessionmgr2 and in
Murnen, et al. 1989 a study of college student established that
most victims blamed themselves at
http://web.ebscohost.com/ehost/pdf?v...0sessionmgr108 ).
Yes, it is true that most victims erase the line and blame
themselves. “I should have…” is the most common lamentation. Hind
sight gets confounded by grief and recovery. Yet, the last thing a
rape victim needs is for you or anyone else in their support
network to add to that grief by adding your intentional or
unintentional blame. Keep oil and water apart. Defense attorneys
often blame victims in the courtroom, media reports often imply or
convey to blame to victims; and since rape victim’s family and
friends grieve too, they often blame self and the victims. You
wouldn’t slap a mugging victim for walking down the street alone.
They’ve already been through enough. But sometimes we believe that
only good things happen to good people (Google “Just World
Syndrome” for more insight to this myth). Violence happens to both
morally good and bad people. It always has.
Helping Survivors To Avoid Blaming Themselves
Consider the comments made by two rape victims I personally
interviewed (their names have been changed to protect their
privacy). Nella had been raped in Colorado five years prior to our
interview. The rapist trapped her and assaulted her over the course
of three hours. Nella escaped and ran to get help from a friend.
They called the police. The police put out an APB on the
assailant’s car and arrested him within the hour while he casually
shopped for groceries in the local supermarket.
Nella told me that during the trial her attacker and his
attorney turned the entire attack back against her. “I sat
stunned on the witness stand,” Nella explained. “trying to figure
out why I had to defend myself when I was the one who was so
brutally attacked.” “I feel peace right now, but I live in constant
fear that when he gets out, he’ll somehow find me. Anyway, he
threatened my life while he attacked me, saying if I went to police
he’d find me and kill me.” Nella explained through tear filled
eyes. “I went to police anyway.” Nella, like many other rape
victims was emotionally victimized again during the trial. Nella’s
attacker was sent to prison and is already out on parole.
Jana’s assailant was a coworker. He asked her out to dinner and
attacked her in a secluded area near the restaurant. Afterwards, he
showed no remorse, no guilt, not even an acknowledgment that he’d
just done something terrible to her.
“He was such a nice man to me until we were alone.” Jana
reported. “Then his countenance change. I saw evil in his eyes, but
couldn’t get away because he had planned the entire thing in
advance.” Jana shook her head as she gently held the locket
hanging on the chain around her neck. “This is a picture of my
son.” She opened the locket. “He was the only good thing
that came from the whole experience.”
Jana reported the rape to police. The rapist served time in jail
and was under suspicion for other rapes in the area but nothing
ever came of that. The rapist is out of prison now. Jana moved and
tries to move on with her life; much like the countless other
survivors throughout the state and country are forced to do.
At the larger social level rape can be understood through
scientific studies, analysis of crime data, and interviews with
rapists. We can understand trends about rapists and why they do
what they do. We can also understand national social facts that can
indicate how best to handle the problem from every level of social
intervention. What are some of the possible explanations for high
rape rates in the United States? A few trends emerge from my
studies:
-An increase in rape prevention programs and rape crisis centers
so that, unlike in the past, where a rape victim had a very
difficult time in reporting rape, we now have a structure in place
where victims can go for assistance. This may indicate that rape
happened more in the past, but was reported less because of the
absence of a legitimate place to go report it and get help.
-An increase in substance use among perpetrators and victims
which is highly correlated with decreased inhibitions by men who
might not otherwise act violently toward women.
-1960s, 1970’s, and 1980’s shift from abstinence to sexual
promiscuity where men are more likely to feel entitled to whatever
sexual desire they have. This may have also coincided with male
value shifts in expectations of self, women, and sexual predation
(see Figure 6 below).
Many men in our day have abdicated the protector, nurturer, and
community-minded roles common among men in the past. Rapists have
specifically become scam artists where the confidence scam of
establishing trust among women then violating that trust has become
all too common. Many rapists report feeling victimized when they
are arrested and held accountable (over 6 out of 10 US rapist are
not held accountable in terms of prison or guilty verdicts). Let me
restate this crucial fact, rapists are the core of the problem (See
Figure 7).
“A man can use his hand with a number of different motivations.
He could caress the hair of his loved one, massage a back, or
simply hold another-motivated by love and concern. He could also
strangle, beat, and otherwise inflict pain upon another. It’s not
that the hand is a body part exclusively designed for nurturance or
violence—it’s the motivation behind how the hand is used that makes
the hand what it is.”
The same can be said about our body’s sexual parts. In a mutually
consenting relationship between people of legal age of consent,
sexual parts of the body can be used out of a motivation of
intimacy. For rapists the sexual parts are used out of power,
domination, anger, and control.
Greg Cooper utilized a model with four types of rapists based on
their risk of harm to the victim and their level of confidence in
their violence. Power-Reassurance Rapistsare the most common type of rapist; he uses little to no
violence; has a very weak sense of self and of lacking “manliness;”
and rape is his outlet of power, domination, anger, and
control (see Figure 8). This rapist is inadequate in
general and rapes in a futile attempt to feel adequate. The
Power-Assertive Rapisthas a very low
self-concept; he attempts to reassure himself of his manhood; and
uses very little force or violence. His deep-seated shame
drives him to offend often and not feel long-term satisfaction from
the assaults.
The Anger-Excitation Rapist is the least common type,
yet the most evil; he will torture, kidnap, and even kill his
victim out of pleasure-seeking at the cost of another’s pain; he is
sadistic and predatory; and he uses his intelligence to plot and
prey upon unsuspecting victims. Greg Cooper also referred
to him as “evil” and “the dark side of humanity.”
How can a man ascribe to such low values toward another individual?
I borrow my answer from a Ugandan born man who lived in South
Africa for a decade. David Ssjeinja said, in our interview about
the enormously high rape rates in South Africa, that:
“Real men don’t rape. Raping is really against the character
of a good man and all that is necessary for good behavior in a
civilized world.”
Perhaps this will be the legacy of the first decade of the new
millennium, where social reform programs focus on efforts to
transform values of men toward a more respectful view of women.
Such an organization can be found today online, www.mencanstoprape.org/
. Men Can Stop Rape is an organization that allies male youths to
women in preventing rape and other acts of violence toward women.
One hopes that some of society’s potential rapists get exposure to
such a program, experience a shift in values toward respecting
women, and ultimately lower the incidence of rape in Utah and the
United States.
Useful Internet Resources About Rape and Rape Prevention
