3.4: Who Would Sexually Abuse a Child?

Who Would Sexually Abuse a Child?

Children are sexually abused by either:

• A relative who is assumed to be part of the child’s nuclear or close extended family (intrafamilial abuse, or incest).
• Someone outside of the child’s family (pedophiles).

The closer the relation between the perpetrator and the victim, the more harm will be done to the victim emotionally and psychologically. These perpetrators will be examined more closely later in this chapter.

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Both males and females have been known to sexually abuse children, although more than 95% of reported cases involve male perpetrators. More than half of these offenders were abused in one way or another themselves. Researchers have found that child sexual abusers are poorly attached individuals who are manipulative and have low self-esteem. They also have poor social skills and strive to overcome the feeling of lacking power.

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Studies have found that:

1. The perpetrator must be motivated to abuse, and sexually aroused by the child. The perpetrators’ normal sexual outlets, as endorsed by society, are generally blocked.

2. The perpetrator lacks internal inhibitors, or an inner voice, that prohibits him from acting in the desire for abuse.

3. External inhibitors, that would normally prevent the abuse, are not in place (this may include absent parents, socially isolated families, or other things that make the child more vulnerable).

4. The perpetrator must overcome the child’s resistance to abuse, playing upon the powerlessness that makes children vulnerable.

Multiple studies of abusers have found that they generally had no one to confide in while they were growing up. The abusers typically used sex to make themselves feel important and balanced, masturbating repetitively to sexual fantasies prior to the age of 12. Most of the families of sexual offenders, while growing up, were filled with domestic violence and mistreatment. Most child sexual abusers have indicated that masculinity was equated with sexual conquest. This research largely centers around male perpetrators, as there aren’t enough women perpetrators who have been researched to make adequate generalized statements. One commonality that is obvious for men and women is that these perpetrators often suffered significant psychological and physical abuse during their childhoods and that a majority had been sexually abused as children.

Juveniles can also be sexual abuse perpetrators. Histories of victimization often lead to juveniles who seek to offend against others. When juveniles sexually offend, that is not in itself their primary goal. Some may resort to aggression and violence, while others use experimentation or exploration as their goal. As with adult offenders, a few juvenile offenders may be mentally ill or otherwise cognitively impaired. Early intervention for juvenile offenders is essential in helping them prevent further abuse.

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Research with child molesters has shown: (The Oprah Winfrey Show)

• Most child molesters (90%) are known to the child (family members, friends, neighbors, people they are used to seeing… NOT strangers).
• Molesters seek out and seduce needy, vulnerable children, then they gain their trust. Child molestation is very calculated and deliberate. Molesters NEED the trust of the child for the ongoing molestation to be possible.
• Molesters confuse the child to believe that the molestation feels good. The child often blames themselves out of this confusion.
• If the child starts to become resistant, molesters use guilt and threats of harm to others to keep the secret and ongoing molestation.
• Many child molesters have stated that they were bringing pleasure to the child and the child was giving them pleasure, so the molester didn’t think they were doing anything wrong or harmful at the time.

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