5.4: What Causes an Adult to Neglect a Child?

What Causes an Adult to Neglect A Child?

Economic Reasons

Society typically pairs the idea of child neglect with poverty. In actuality, neglect happens in all socioeconomic levels but is less likely to be reported and noticed in middle- or upper-class families. A young child who returns home to an empty house, lets him or herself in, prepares their own meals, and sometimes puts themselves to bed, would be considered to be neglected. If this child lives in a middle- or upper-class neighborhood, it is very likely that nobody has noticed. The child may be well groomed, have good clothes, have lots of toys and electronics, but still be lacking the emotional and supervision pieces required for proper development. In a poor neighborhood, where the clothes, toys and food may be lacking, this child’s situation is more likely to be noticed by others.

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This brings forth the age-old question… Which came first, poverty or neglect? Does the parent's inability to behave in a responsible way cause them to live in poverty, or does the fact that they live in poverty influence their inability to care properly for their child? Those families living in poverty tend to be more involved with social services than do those families living in a higher socioeconomic level. The involvement of social services means more people are watching what occurs in a family. When more people are watching, they tend to suspect and notice things like child neglect. Although neglect happens at all socioeconomic levels, it is more often reported for those who live in poverty.

Ecological Causes

Again, the question becomes which came first, poverty or neglect? “Does the low morale of unfriendly, poorly kept neighborhoods severely stress parents and zap their strength for adequate childcare? Or does the obvious lethargy in those unable to parent lead to other undone tasks, such as proper housekeeping and adequate home repair, and to the inability to support and communicate with neighbors? Do neighborhoods fail to understand the practices of newly immigrated parents and therefore isolate them? If a parent’s ability to care for their children is influenced by the total social context in which they live, then feeling unsupported by their surroundings could well create parents who neglect.“ (Crosson-Tower, 2010, pp. 74-75) How does society contribute to neglect? Generational customs, the cost of adequate housing, employment issues, affordable quality child care, and many other societal issues contribute to the ecological causes of child neglect.

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Personal and Individual Causes

Researchers have found that the roots of neglectful parents tie back to the parent’s development and the way in which he or she has learned to process certain information. As individuals, we tend to process information with cognition (information that tells us what actions will cause what effects) and with affect (experiences in feeling that motivate protective or affectionate behavior; this promotes exploration and learning).

Parents who neglect the needs of their children may feel isolated and have difficulty forming relationships or carrying on the routine tasks involved with everyday life. They may feel anger or sadness over their own childhood needs which went unmet and find it impossible to recognize and meet the needs of their children. They may see nothing wrong with what they are doing, as it is all they know. The same type of parent has a low success rate in maintaining lasting adult relationships with partners and tends to be a single parent of many children as a consequence. These parents may discipline their children out of their own need for peace and quiet, rather than a concern for what their child is doing. Researcher Polansky and various colleagues (1991) studied the personality traits of mothers considered to be neglectful of their children. They identified the following:

Apathetic – Futile (These mothers seem to have given up on living, be withdrawn, and feel that nothing is worth doing. Why should they wash the clothes? The kids will just get them dirty again.)

Impulse Ridden (These mothers have a low tolerance for any frustration and seem unable to deal with delayed gratification. They use very poor judgment. They may be high energy but focus that on meeting their own needs and desires rather than those of their children. Children learn they cannot trust anyone or anything for consistency. )

Mentally Delayed (These mothers may operate at a much younger cognitive level than their chronological level indicates. They may or may not be able to care for a child if they have added support services to help.)

Reactive-Depressive (The mother is unable to adjust to some part of her life and is triggered into a depression. She is unable to come out of it and care for her children.)

Psychotic (Parents who are psychotic are not able to consistently care for their children’s needs. When hallucinating, the parent may not even be conscious of the child’s presence. A very low percentage of neglectful parents are psychotic, but those who are will likely need medication and services to support any parenting efforts.)

 

Researchers have theorized that there are three basic styles of neglect, based on how parents process information (Crittendon, 1999):

Disorganized Neglect (Inconsistency, living from crisis to crisis. These families have many problems. Feelings are dominant with minimal cognition present. Crisis becomes a way of life; children learn to be explosive and dramatic with any requests in order to get attention.)

Emotional Neglect (These families are on the opposite end of the spectrum from those families in disorganized neglect. These families are unable to make emotional connections with others, are emotionally unavailable to their children, and make exclusive use of cognition. The children learn not to express any feelings. )

Depressed Neglect (Families of depressed neglect demonstrate an attitude that nothing is worth doing. They guard against both cognition and affect and appear withdrawn and dull.)

 

Other issues which may lead to child neglect include:

Substance abuse - Parents under the influence of drugs or alcohol are not fully available to be adequate parents and meet the needs of their children. When this is a pattern, children are physically, emotionally and otherwise harmed. When expectant mothers abuse substances, their children are likely to be born prematurely. The children may also have been exposed to infectious diseases, be HIV infected, and may demonstrate signs of fetal alcohol syndrome, failure to thrive, intrauterine growth retardation, or central nervous system disorders. Babies born exposed or addicted to substances have a greater tendency to die of Sudden Infant Death Syndrome. “Neurological disturbances may cause babies to demonstrate such symptoms as irritability, tremors, high-pitched crying, increased or decreased muscle tone, problems with sucking or frantic sucking, seizures, diarrhea, excessive vomiting, rapid and unusual movements, and disturbed sleep patterns. “ (Crosson-Tower, 2010, p. 90) It is important to note that the HIV virus can be transmitted in utero, at delivery, and through breast milk. Although newborns may test negative initially, they may later show evidence of infection. Children born to non-abusing parents may start out fine and later feel the effects if their parents become substance abusers. Parents addicted to drugs or alcohol tend to neglect the basics of eating and sleeping and are unable to think about and care for the needs of themselves or others. In many cases, it appears that the young children are acting as the parents in caring for the adults.

Domestic Violence and Neglect - When families are caught up in a violent struggle between family members, they have little time or energy to take care of the needs of their children. Abusive parents may know little about their children's schedules, interests or ambitions. They may be unaware of how their own violent behavior affects their children. The abused partner may be so focused on protecting him/herself that they are unable to recognize or meet the children’s needs. The children are often caught in the middle and do whatever they can to make both parents happy, so they avoid further exposure to abuse. The older children typically take on the role of caregiver for younger siblings, even when the older children are very young themselves.