7.2: The Science of Giving and Receiving Support
- Page ID
- 206274
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In this section, we will explore acts of kindness, the science behind giving and receiving support.
According to Dr. Michael Carlson and colleagues (1988)¹⁷, there is a mechanism behind how this works. Priming involves the phenomenon where a positive mood influences perceptions, making everything appear more positive. This effect occurs because positive thoughts are more readily accessible, leading to a generally positive evaluation of one's surroundings. Furthermore, when individuals experience good fortune, they tend to focus their attention on their own advantages, which may lead to a desire to rectify perceived disadvantages in others. A positive mood also fosters a prosocial social outlook, prompting individuals to respond in ways that contribute to a more positive community and reinforce a positive view of human nature. Engaging in acts of kindness and generosity not only contributes to mood maintenance but also helps sustain a positive emotional state over time.
What is the Right Dose of Helping?
Research indicates that concentrating multiple acts of kindness into one day may be more effective than spreading them out over time. For instance, a study found that performing five acts of kindness in a single day led to greater increases in well-being compared to spreading them out over a week (Layous & Lyubomirsky, 2014¹⁸; Lyubomirsky, Sheldon, et al., 2005¹⁹). Similarly, performing positive activities too frequently within a week might diminish their benefits, suggesting the importance of dosage and timing in positive activity interventions (Lyubomirsky, Sheldon et al., 2005)¹⁹. Acts of kindness and volunteering are powerful interventions that foster connections and meaning, potentially mitigating adaptation (Curry et al., 2018)²⁰.
Social Support: Giving is Better than Receiving
Social support involves feeling supported and having people available for both emotional and tangible assistance. In a five-year study of 1,500 married couples, researchers examined various aspects of social support, including giving emotional support to spouses and helping others with practical tasks. They also looked at receiving emotional support from spouses and having access to instrumental help from others. The study also considered general social contact with others. Helping others by offering practical assistance to friends, family, and neighbors, or providing emotional support to a spouse, was linked to lower mortality rates. However, receiving support didn't affect mortality once the impact of giving support was considered. The notion that individuals who are less healthy may be less capable of providing assistance to others and consequently may have shorter lifespans was considered. However, researchers addressed this concern by measuring and statistically adjusting for participants' health status at the beginning of the study, as well as their income, education level, and susceptibility to stress. One hypothesis suggests that providing support could cultivate a more positive outlook, which in turn may offer health advantages. Conversely, receiving support might sometimes have adverse effects on well-being, especially when it becomes overly noticeable (Brown et al., 2003)²¹. We can conclude that the most effective form of support to offer is support that goes unnoticed or is less visible.
How Can You Boost Your Own Helping Habits?
Start by keeping a journal of your acts of kindness, whether they're small gestures like offering a smile to someone who needs it, running errands for a neighbor, or simply holding a door open. Recognize that even seemingly minor actions contribute to a greater good. Make a habit of lending a hand, perhaps dedicating a day each week solely to acts of kindness. Research by Dr. Sonja Lyubomirsky²² at the University of California, Riverside, suggests that committing to five acts of kindness in a single day can have lasting benefits for weeks to come. Visualize yourself helping others, as studies by Mikulincer and Shaver²³ demonstrate that contemplating supportive figures in our lives can increase our willingness to assist those in need. Draw on your unique talents when giving, as it's easier to help when leveraging your strengths. Finally, reflect on the ways others have supported you, whether presently or in the past, and let that inspire your own acts of kindness.
Want to Feel More Prosocial? Loving-Kindness Meditation
Loving-Kindness Meditation is a traditional approach that is well-known for identifying successive stages of meditation during which one progressively cultivates loving-kindness towards themselves, a close friend, a "neutral" person, a difficult individual, all of these equally, and gradually, the entire universe. You can read more about this practice, and follow a step-by-step guide on the Loving-Kindness Meditation at Greater Good Action²⁴.
To deepen your understanding of self-compassion, read Dr. Kristin Neff's paper, Self-Compassion: An Alternative Conceptualization of a Healthy Attitude Toward Oneself²⁵.
Afterwards, read a recent, brief news article²⁸ with an update on the money-happiness peak, written by Michele W. Berger and published on Penn Today, a business journal from the Wharton School of the University of Pennsylvania.
If you're finding Dr. Kristin Neff's research valuable, explore further insights on self-compassion through her website, Self-Compassion²⁶.
Watch a video uploaded by PopTech on YouTube of Dr. Elizabeth Dunn discussing happiness and money²⁷, specifically how people can effectively use their money to promote well-being.
- Define self-compassion
- How is self-compassion different from self-esteem?
- What are some examples of differences in self-compassion between groups of individuals?
- At what level does money stop "buying" more happiness?
- What does money have to do with savoring? How does money get in the way of happiness?
- Understand how to spend money to maximize happiness
- How was money spending related to job satisfaction and performance?
- What is the updated finding discussed in this article and how does it relate to what was described in the Dunn video?
- How does emotional well-being change trajectories of happiness-money connections?
Attribution
¹⁷Carlson, M., Charlin, V., & Miller, N. (1988). Positive mood and helping behavior: A test of six hypotheses. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 55(2), 211–229. https://doi.org/10.1037/0022-3514.55.2.211
¹⁸Lyubomirsky, S., & Layous, K. (2014). The how, why, what, when, and who of happiness: mechanisms underlying the success of positive activity interventions. In J. Gruber & J. T. Moskowitz (Eds.), Positive emotion : integrating the light sides and dark sides. Oxford University Press.
¹⁹Lyubomirsky, S., Sheldon, K. M., & Schkade, D. (2005). Pursuing happiness: The architecture of sustainable change. Review of general psychology, 9(2), 111-131. https://doi.org/10.1037/1089-2680.9.2.111
²⁰Curry, O. S., Rowland, L. A., Van Lissa, C. J., Zlotowitz, S., McAlaney, J., & Whitehouse, H. (2018). Happy to help? A systematic review and meta-analysis of the effects of performing acts of kindness on the well-being of the actor. Journal of Experimental Social Psychology, 76, 320-329. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jesp.2018.02.014
²¹Brown, S. L., Nesse, R. M., Vinokur, A. D., & Smith, D. M. (2003). Providing social support may be more beneficial than receiving it: Results from a prospective study of mortality. Psychological science, 14(4), 320-327. https://doi.org/10.1111/1467-9280.14461
²²Sonja Lyubomisrky. [Personal website]. (2024). Retrieved from https://sonjalyubomirsky.com/
²³Mikulincer, M., & Shaver, P. (2005). Mental representations and attachment security. Interpersonal cognition, 233-266.
²⁴Loving-Kindness Meditation. (2024). Greater Good in Action. Retrieved from https://ggia.berkeley.edu/practice/loving_kindness_meditation
²⁵NEFF, K. (2003). Self-Compassion: An Alternative Conceptualization of a Healthy Attitude Toward Oneself. Self and Identity, 2(2), 85–101. https://doi.org/10.1080/15298860309032
²⁶Self-Compassion. (n.d.). Discover the Empowering Videos Featuring Dr. Kristin Neff. https://self-compassion.org/videos-featuring-dr-kristin-neff/
²⁷PopTech. (2011, January 3). Elizabeth Dunn: Happiness and Money [YouTube]. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bwmWHV79vTQ
²⁸Berger, M. W. (2023, March 28). Does money buy happiness? Here’s what the research says. Knowledge at Wharton. https://knowledge.wharton.upenn.edu/article/does-money-buy-happiness-heres-what-the-research-says/