6.4: Listening Styles
Attitudes and Beliefs about Listening
Now that we have a better understanding of the importance of listening, the stages, and functions, let’s learn about four different listening styles. Just as there are different types of listening, depending upon the context of the situation, there are also different styles of listening. More often than not, we as competent communicators will adjust and switch our styles of listening depending upon the context of the situation. First, we need to define what a listening style is before we define the different types. A listening style is “a set of attitudes and beliefs about listening” (Floyd, 1985, p. 136). Researchers Kittie Watson, Larry Barker, and James Weaver III (1995) identified four distinct listening styles: people-oriented, action-oriented, content-oriented, and time-oriented. You might have a dominant style that can be seen on multiple occasions, but you can adjust to the situation. Tables \(\PageIndex{1–4}\ break down the four types of listening styles, list some of the common positive and negative characteristics, and provide strategies for communicating with different listening styles. (These tables are used with permission from their author, Kina Mallard, 1999.)
People-Oriented
If you are a people-oriented listener you tune in to people’s emotions, feelings, and moods (Bodie & Worthington, 70). You relate more to relationship building when listening to someone communicate with you, often being considered the type of person who will “lend an ear.” You try to find common interests with the other person and listen to others without judgment. As a people-oriented listener, you allow emotional space for people to express themselves, which is particularly valuable in interpersonal relationships.
For example, if your significant other comes home in a bad mood, venting to you about their challenging workday and lack of sleep, you might respond with “I’m so sorry you had a bad day. I can see how frustrating that situation is for you. I know when I haven’t had enough sleep, everything seems ten times as frustrating, too. Tell me more about what’s going on. How are you feeling?” This is an empathetic response, typical of a people-oriented listener, that demonstrates compassion and understanding without judgment.
Action-Oriented
Content-Oriented
Time-Oriented
If you are efficient with your use of time, then you are likely a time-oriented listener. When you are communicating with someone, you want the person to get to the point of their story quickly while you are checking the clock to be sure to make your next appointment on time or get going on your next task. If you are a time-oriented listener, you might even avoid eye contact, or interrupt to move the conversation along and end it promptly. As a result, this type of listener can appear insensitive or uncaring toward others. A prime example of a time-oriented listener is an emergency room doctor who wants you to get to the point of the matter quickly so they can do a proper diagnosis before moving on to the next patient. They are bound to serve patients in rapid succession due to the time-sensitive climate of an emergency room. To some, this approach may come off as uncaring, although that is not necessarily how the doctor feels.
In an interpersonal relationship between close friends, an exchange with a time-oriented listener might look something like this:
Friend 1: "Hey, good to see you. How was your day?"
Friend 2: "It was great. How was yours?"
Friend 1: "Oh, you won’t believe what happened with Celia today! I had to review the meeting notes with her, and she started to…"
Friend 2: (Interrupts Friend 1 while checking the time) "Actually, tell me about it over dinner, so we’re not late for our reservation. We need to be there before five o'clock."
Although the interruption may be perceived as insensitive, the time-oriented listener (Friend 2) is communicating that they are not ready to fully listen until their perceived time constraints have been met. People often confuse time-oriented with action-oriented listeners, but the action-oriented listener does not mind taking time on a matter if it is focused on action-oriented solutions, whereas the time-oriented listener’s predominant focus is meeting time constraints efficiently.
Combining Styles
People tend to have one dominant listening style; however, most research indicates that people will use at least two different listening styles. That being said, people are not typically comfortable using all four styles. For example, a person who is predominantly a content-oriented listener but also people-oriented would want to hear everything out and take time to analyze the details while acknowledging other people’s feelings or challenges with empathetic language. That same person is likely not comfortable as an action-oriented or time-oriented listener. Likewise, an action-oriented listener who also has time-oriented tendencies will usually shy away from people-oriented or content-oriented listening styles. Different combinations of listening styles can exist within each person. Once you identify your listening style(s), you can create awareness around how and why you listen the way you do and work to make adjustments where necessary to improve your listening skills.
There has been much debate over the impact of gender on listening. Research from the 20th century has resulted in stereotypes that should be re-examined. The initial research into what was called “masculine” or “feminine” speech focused on the speech communities in which we are raised. Research suggested that masculine communicators engage in “report” talk, whereas feminine communicators engage in “rapport” talk (Tannen, 1986, 2013). Those who engage in report talk are said to be concerned with the exchange of information and getting things accomplished. Those who engage in rapport talk are concerned with establishing connections and maintaining the relationship (Fixmer-Oraiz & Wood, 2019).
This area of research has also been explored from a scientific perspective. According to audiologist Beth McCormick (2018):
Research findings suggest that men do in fact listen differently than women. But are the identified differences straightforward, clear cut or even black and white? Actually they might be—gray and white that is. Our brains are composed of both gray matter and white matter.
A study between University of California, Irvine, and University of New Mexico researched differences and found that “The amount of gray matter was six times greater in the brains of the male research participants, while the women participating in the study had 10 times the amount of white matter the men did.” This finding supported the notion that men and women may “listen and assimilate information differently, [but] the difference does not appear to affect cognition or our ability to listen.”
What does all of this mean in terms of listening? People do have different styles of communication, and as a result, may engage in different listening styles, regardless of gender. We may prefer to engage in report talk when we are conversing with someone at work and may choose to engage in rapport talk when we are with our partners or friends. Although there are scientific differences from a biological perspective, one’s identified gender also impacts how they may listen. Having moved beyond binary views of gender, we know that our style of communication is as fluid as our gender.
Fundamentals of Public Speaking, Florida State College at Jacksonville and Mary Lee Cunill, PhD. CC BY 4.0 .