1: Introduction to Marriage and Families

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Two people sit on a bench, one has their arm around the other. — Figure \(\PageIndex{1}\) If we see a young couple in a park, what do we assume about them? Are our assumptions based on what we see, or what we’ve experienced? (Credit: Jaroslav A. Polák/flickr)Elena and Cam met through friends when they were in their early twenties. Elena had been out of college for two years and worked in the city procurement office; she took graduate classes in operations management, but she’d need a few more years to finish her Master’s. Cam had received extensive computing training while in the Navy, and was a database architect at an insurance company.In their first few years of dating, the idea of marriage came up mostly through other people. Friends’ weddings seemed like monthly events, and “who’s next?” small talk was unavoidable. Elena’s grandmother and aunts added to the chorus; they talked about their home country, where women were married with a couple of children by the time they reached Elena’s age. (Elena often pointed out that they were wrong, and the average age of marriage had been climbing for decades.) These pressures were pretty minor at first. They came in the form of jokes, wedding dress texts, and the occasional insult about Cam’s salary. But every once in a while someone would sit Elena down for a serious talk, or corner Cam while he was at a family gathering.Most of Elena’s family predicted that things would change when she earned her graduate degree and could “focus on her family.” Things did change; Elena became compliance officer for the office of city services, resulting in almost a ten percent increase in her salary. Cam became a supervisor three months later. They moved out of their apartment, which was in Cam’s mother’s garage, and into their own place downtown. They were happy. They were committed to each other. They didn’t get married.Five years later, Elena and Cam were still living downtown, but they’d traded their rental for a condo. Aside from work, they co-founded a nonprofit where Elena taught financial literacy and Cam ran computing boot camps for recent immigrants and refugees. Maybe it was the hundreds of children they met through the organization, or maybe it was seeing their friends’ kids, or maybe it was being in her thirties, but Elena realized she wanted to be a mother. They started the adoption process, and eighteen months later welcomed a young girl who had been born in another country.When did Elena and Cam become a family? Was it when they moved in together? When they adopted the child? Does their not being married matter?What is a Family?When we talk about family, it is easy to assume everyone agrees on what that means. But if you stop and think for a moment, you will realize that “family” can mean very different things depending on culture, law, or even personal feelings. Sociologists care a lot about how family is defined because those definitions impact policies, social supports, and how people experience belonging. Sociologically speaking, a family is often described as a group of two or more people who are connected by blood, marriage, adoption, or a strong emotional bond, and who live together as an economic unit. But even that definition has its limits. For example, the U.S. Census defines family strictly as people related by birth, marriage, or adoption who live together under one roof. That means some close knit groups, like roommates who consider each other family or LGBTQIA+ chosen families, do not count legally. Understanding these nuances helps us see how the word “family” carries a lot of weight, influencing everything from who gets health benefits to how social services are distributed. This chapter will explore different ways families are defined and understood, the theories sociologists use to analyze families, and how public policy interacts with these definitions.When you ask someone “What is a family?” you might get answers ranging from “people who live in the same house” to “people I love and rely on.” Generally, family includes biological connections like parents and children, legal ties such as marriage or adoption, and emotional bonds that create a support system. These elements often overlap but do not always align perfectly. The U.S. Census definition is narrow and focused on legal or biological ties within a household. But in real life, families are much more flexible. Some people count close friends, mentors, or community members as family, especially when biological relatives are absent or estranged. Many Americans consider their pets family members, and many others include chosen family or people who are not related but who provide emotional support. This highlights the evolving social understanding of family beyond strict biology or legal ties. See in the importance of pets as family in the survey results from the Pew Research Center which found most pet owners see their pets as part of their family.Families come in many shapes and sizes. The classic “nuclear family” includes two parents and their children, but this is just one model among many. Extended families, which include grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins, are common in many cultures and still important in the U.S.Other common family forms include single parent households, stepfamilies formed through remarriage, and multigenerational families where three or more generations live together. Cohabiting couples who live together but are not married are increasingly common and challenge traditional legal definitions. Chosen families or groups of people who intentionally create family like bonds outside of biological or legal ties are also important. These families show how emotional connection can be just as vital as biology or law.Forms and Typologies of FamilyFigure 1. Family Typologies: From Nuclear to Chosen Families

graph of family forms in the U.S. — Figure \(\PageIndex{1}\) If we see a young couple in a park, what do we assume about them? Are our assumptions based on what we see, or what we’ve experienced? (Credit: Jaroslav A. Polák/flickr)Elena and Cam met through friends when they were in their early twenties. Elena had been out of college for two years and worked in the city procurement office; she took graduate classes in operations management, but she’d need a few more years to finish her Master’s. Cam had received extensive computing training while in the Navy, and was a database architect at an insurance company.In their first few years of dating, the idea of marriage came up mostly through other people. Friends’ weddings seemed like monthly events, and “who’s next?” small talk was unavoidable. Elena’s grandmother and aunts added to the chorus; they talked about their home country, where women were married with a couple of children by the time they reached Elena’s age. (Elena often pointed out that they were wrong, and the average age of marriage had been climbing for decades.) These pressures were pretty minor at first. They came in the form of jokes, wedding dress texts, and the occasional insult about Cam’s salary. But every once in a while someone would sit Elena down for a serious talk, or corner Cam while he was at a family gathering.Most of Elena’s family predicted that things would change when she earned her graduate degree and could “focus on her family.” Things did change; Elena became compliance officer for the office of city services, resulting in almost a ten percent increase in her salary. Cam became a supervisor three months later. They moved out of their apartment, which was in Cam’s mother’s garage, and into their own place downtown. They were happy. They were committed to each other. They didn’t get married.Five years later, Elena and Cam were still living downtown, but they’d traded their rental for a condo. Aside from work, they co-founded a nonprofit where Elena taught financial literacy and Cam ran computing boot camps for recent immigrants and refugees. Maybe it was the hundreds of children they met through the organization, or maybe it was seeing their friends’ kids, or maybe it was being in her thirties, but Elena realized she wanted to be a mother. They started the adoption process, and eighteen months later welcomed a young girl who had been born in another country.When did Elena and Cam become a family? Was it when they moved in together? When they adopted the child? Does their not being married matter?What is a Family?When we talk about family, it is easy to assume everyone agrees on what that means. But if you stop and think for a moment, you will realize that “family” can mean very different things depending on culture, law, or even personal feelings. Sociologists care a lot about how family is defined because those definitions impact policies, social supports, and how people experience belonging. Sociologically speaking, a family is often described as a group of two or more people who are connected by blood, marriage, adoption, or a strong emotional bond, and who live together as an economic unit. But even that definition has its limits. For example, the U.S. Census defines family strictly as people related by birth, marriage, or adoption who live together under one roof. That means some close knit groups, like roommates who consider each other family or LGBTQIA+ chosen families, do not count legally. Understanding these nuances helps us see how the word “family” carries a lot of weight, influencing everything from who gets health benefits to how social services are distributed. This chapter will explore different ways families are defined and understood, the theories sociologists use to analyze families, and how public policy interacts with these definitions.When you ask someone “What is a family?” you might get answers ranging from “people who live in the same house” to “people I love and rely on.” Generally, family includes biological connections like parents and children, legal ties such as marriage or adoption, and emotional bonds that create a support system. These elements often overlap but do not always align perfectly. The U.S. Census definition is narrow and focused on legal or biological ties within a household. But in real life, families are much more flexible. Some people count close friends, mentors, or community members as family, especially when biological relatives are absent or estranged. Many Americans consider their pets family members, and many others include chosen family or people who are not related but who provide emotional support. This highlights the evolving social understanding of family beyond strict biology or legal ties. See in the importance of pets as family in the survey results from the Pew Research Center which found most pet owners see their pets as part of their family.Families come in many shapes and sizes. The classic “nuclear family” includes two parents and their children, but this is just one model among many. Extended families, which include grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins, are common in many cultures and still important in the U.S.Other common family forms include single parent households, stepfamilies formed through remarriage, and multigenerational families where three or more generations live together. Cohabiting couples who live together but are not married are increasingly common and challenge traditional legal definitions. Chosen families or groups of people who intentionally create family like bonds outside of biological or legal ties are also important. These families show how emotional connection can be just as vital as biology or law.Forms and Typologies of FamilyFigure 1. Family Typologies: From Nuclear to Chosen Families

1.1: Front Matter
- Table of Contents
1.2: What Is Marriage? What Is a Family?
Marriage and family are key structures in most societies. While the two institutions have historically been closely linked in U.S. culture, their connection is becoming more complex. The relationship between marriage and family is an interesting topic of study to sociologists.
1.3: Sociological Imagination
The chapter explores how the concepts of family and marriage have evolved over time. It examines historical shifts in family structures, marriage practices, and societal norms. The chapter also defines key terms related to family and marriage, illustrating how these definitions can vary across cultures and periods. The focus is on understanding the changing dynamics of family life in response to social, economic, and cultural factors.
1.4: Variations in Family Life
People's concepts of marriage and family in the United States are changing. Increases in cohabitation, same-sex partners, and singlehood are altering of our ideas of marriage. Similarly, single parents, same-sex parents, cohabitating parents, and unwed parents are changing our notion of what it means to be a family. While most children still live in opposite-sex, two-parent, married households, that is no longer viewed as the only type of nuclear family.
- 1.4.1: Challenges Families Face

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What is a Family?